Sexiest Man Ever!

So I work at a pizza joint in Florida. A place where you are never really sure of anything. -

Well I know I am the Sexiest Man Ever but let me tell you about the story behind the name. It was a sunny afternoon and I was tossing pizzas like I always did. I had my two drivers doing their prep and taking deliveries whenever one would sheepishly pop up. One of my drivers, lets call him Jim, for the sake of confidentiality, was tall, thin, yet well built. He biked all the time and stayed reasonably in shape.

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As some of you know I love coffee, and every chance I get I will manipulate, buy, or make coffee when the opportunity presents itself. Lucky for me I found out a few weeks back that Jim's girlfriend worked at Starbucks! You know what that means? She gets free coffee, HENCE she loves her BF so he gets free coffee, HENCE Jim works with me I get free coffee? The last part I am not as sure about hence the question mark.

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When I heard the good news I was more excited then a child handed $100 and taken to a candy shop with no limitations. I had a new connection to getting my fix on coffee. It's all about who you know I guess, and I knew a guy with connections.

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Almost like a ritual Jim would come in the mornings with his little packet of Via and make himself a fresh cup of coffee. Pouring it slowly into his cup as if to savor the smell of the dark roasted vanilla infuse the air with buttery delight.  "Hey Jim, could you get me some of that Via?"

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"Ya man that's no problem, my girlfriend works at Starbucks and gives me boxes of this stuff all the time. I think I have a whole box just sitting at home." There were two fascinating things that struck me about this. First, of course I know your girlfriend works at Starbucks, I memorized her schedule the first day I found out. And second, what man has a whole unused box of Via in his house!

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"Well bring it in." I causally said, with a slight crack in my voice. I played it cool, but my voice sounded like I was still going through puberty (then again maybe it is).

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Well a few weeks pass and I was back in the pizza joint tossing pizzas in the air care free, I genuinely forgot about the Via coffee he promised me. I didn't want to pester. Well as tossed away a costumer walked in for her pick up. Nice lady, a regular by my standards. She was short, with short hair, neck, arms, and fingers, yet could not be considered a "Little People".

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"Good morning, I mean afternoon." I said, correcting myself. To the common man it was afternoon, but when you wake up at 11am it might as well be morning. As we were exchanging pleasantries Jim walks up and hands me a box of Via with a sharpie note inscribed "Sexiest Man Ever!"

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The women's face moves slightly, and her eyes look at Jim and I in a very curious manner, "Well that's nice." At first I think, whats nice? Then it hits me, she thinks the note is from Jim to me, but both him and I know it's from his girlfriend.

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Quickly realizing the misunderstanding, I gently correct her, "Oh no its not like that, it's from his Girlfriend."

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She takes a bigger step back, a little shocked. "Oh well...that's sure nice of you to share." Pause "She must be a nice lady..."

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Realizing my talking only seemed to make it worse I just looked at Jim and we both shrugged our shoulders and somewhat laughed. I guess I could be the Sexiest Man Ever! For a day anyway.

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